Love Nebraska Golf

A very painful watch, or a great idea for a new golf show

I came up with an idea for a new show: two women, who know none of the technical skills about the golf swing, secretly make fun of all the men who think they know all the technical skills about the golf swing.

Nothing could make men more humble.

My wife immediately picked up on the tree-chopping, knee-jerking problems an older golfer was sporting on his tee shot. The guy looked like a good golfer: had the nice clubs, blag, obligable polo, and on and on.

But his swing – which I’ve seen hundreds of times from different people and never really thought much of it – was painful. If you could tear an ACL with your golf swing, this guy’s swing would be my nomination.

My wife’s tee-shot swing is simple: bend the knees like sitting on a tall stool, slow and steady on the way back, don’t over swing on the way down, and hit through the ball. More than half the time, she’s in the fairway.

Note to all men who are trying to teach their wives to golf: When she asks for advice, keep it simple. When she doesn’t ask for advice, keep it quiet.

What I learned from my wife … your playing partners – married to them or not – don’t want your swing tips. If there are 12 swing tips you could offer, they’ve heard 11 of them, 10 of them copyrighted right out of May’s Golf Digest, and one from their own spouse. If people don’t ask for your advice in life, it’s probably because they don’t want it!

I, husband, take you, wife, to be my golf partner. I promise to be true to your one true golf swing, in good shots and in bad, on rainy days and windy days, for birdies and quadruple bogeys, as long as this round shall last.

Do you, husband, enjoy golfing with wife?

I Do!

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Golf Wife / Golf Life is part of a series of short stories about observations my wife has made on the golf course. At first, they seem simplistic and obvious. But each holds a deeper insight to the truth about golf. And, sometimes life, too.

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